


Batter Up

by blueberryfallout



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types, Batman: The Animated Series, Harley Quinn (Comics)
Genre: F/F, F/M, the author kills off joker again 2k16
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-14
Updated: 2016-12-14
Packaged: 2018-09-08 14:59:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 669
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8849419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueberryfallout/pseuds/blueberryfallout
Summary: if i see one more teenage girl talking about how she wants to be "the harley to someone's joker" i'm gonna cry so here's a fic where harley brutally beats the joker to death it's lit. then she and poison ivy run off and adopt dogs and kill people probably and live happily ever after the end.





	

**Author's Note:**

> if i see one more teenage girl talking about how she wants to be "the harley to someone's joker" i'm gonna cry so here's a fic where harley brutally beats the joker to death it's lit. then she and poison ivy run off and adopt dogs and kill people probably and live happily ever after the end.

He leans closer, breathing hot into her face; he always, somehow, smells like the chemicals that made him who he is, the green acid under his skin, the arsenic that stings every time he touches her, as he runs his white hand down the apple of her cheek. “Harley, Harley, _Harley_.”

“H-Hey, Mr. J,” she says, leaning into him like always, pressing close, thinking _maybe it’ll be different this time_ , thinking it could work out and it’ll be like it always has. She broke him out of Arkham this time, right? He owes her. He owes her _everything_ , she remembers, and tightens her grip on the handle of her baseball bat. It’s new, she got it made for her special. 

“Did ya miss me? Tell the truth, now.” Tell the truth, tell the truth, all I want is honesty he always said, then he’d turn around and promise he’d never hurt her again before breaking her jaw as a laugh. She rubs at it without thinking, catches his gaze darting to her mouth, outlined in perfect red lipstick a shade lighter than blood. Smeared across her chin after the fight to get him out. 

“Yeah, Mr. J. I missed you lots.” He’s got a strand of her hair in his fingers now, twirling it, tugging it, making her wince and pull away, protesting, “You’re hurting me.” 

He raises one thin green eyebrow, eternal grin widening. “So?” She doesn’t know why she expected the response to be any different than usual, some small kernel in her still hoping that one day he’ll be the man she thought he was, the man he was supposed to be. A clown to make her laugh, a husband to love her, not…whatever the hell this is. 

Thinking this, she holds his eyes, watching them widen in the second before she headbutts him straight in the mouth, feeling his teeth cut into her forehead and ignoring the sharp sting of pain. She’s had worse from him. He reels back, and she knows, she _knows_ , that if she gives him time to recover it’ll be all over for her, his hands round her neck and Harley Quinn just another battered corpse left behind. 

“So, I want you to stop!” she screams, cracking his skull open with her bat in one wide swing, all the power of her arms behind it. He falls right away but she’s still hitting him, shrieking, blood and bone splattering across her face. “You hurt me you hurt me you hurt me!” she yells, as his skull collapses in on itself and destroys what’s left of his face, that fucking rictus of a grin distorting. He’s not moving but she’s still hitting him, his head a mess of gore, no longer recognizable, he was always so obsessed with his face and now he’ll be buried without one. “I hate you!”

There’s no answer from him, there never will be, but she fancies she sees him twitch and slams her bat against his ribs. 

“Harley.” There’s a slim green hand on her arm, over the tattoo there, the fingers strong but gentle. “Harley, sweetheart, he’s dead.” 

She turns and falls into Ivy’s arms, pressing her face into green skin with no mind for the blood she’s drenched in. “Pammy,” she sobs, “Pammy, he _hurt_ me.”

One hand curves over the back of her skull, threading through her pigtails until they’re loosened out and Ivy can scratch her scalp. “I know, sweetheart. That’s why you came here to kill him.” 

“Oh, yeah,” she sniffs, regaining her cheer with a shove away of all the bad memories until she can beam up at Ivy, watching the real fondness in her forest-green eyes. “Thanks.”

“We have to leave now, Harley. The guards will be coming soon.” There are alarms going off all around them, but Harley thought that was maybe just in her head. She takes Ivy’s hand, squeezing tight, and runs off towards the gates with her. Joker’s corpse begins to rot behind them.

**Author's Note:**

> any way fuck joker, shortly after harley and ivy leave joker's body jason todd shows up for some reason and spits on his corpse before taking selfies with it that barbara keeps as her computer background and they're all happy


End file.
